Prissy Girl's Guide to Camping Part 1

Now that the leaves are turning golden yellow and a slight chill has graced us with it's presence, I decided to post a summer camping entry. Actually, this has been written for some time now but the tardy post has no excuse. One could use the below words for winter camping, but why would you do that when you can get a hotel?

He's licensed.

Over the summer I went camping, in total, 6 glorious times…. I’ll just let that marinate for a second. For the last 15+ years I have drip dried, squatted, cat holed, Go Girl’d and used the ladies room up and down the North American Rockies. Camping is a big deal to me like Dennis Rodman wearing a dress, not really a shocker. But you get dirty. You chip your nails. You can’t take a daily shower. You may not have a flushable toilet. You have to work to stay warm. You have to fight camp smoke. And you have to do it all with a smile on your face otherwise you’ll be that girl. We all know who that is. The girl that ruins everyone’s fun. The girl who can’t take a joke. The girl who will most likely end up crying before the trip is done. I apologize, if you’re that girl, but everyone needs a wakeup call sometime. Having four older brothers, a step-dad who is very outdoorsy, a family cabin in South Park (Yes. Thee South Park) and numerous boyfriends that share the outdoor thrill, I have picked up a thing or two along the way. 



This is a little much, but you get the idea.

1st Thing I Picked Up- Bring Every Type of Weather Clothing

More commonly known as layering, this method has been a proven  life saver to us Prissy Girl’s, especially when traveling. Temperatures in mountain camping can reach to as low as 15 degrees (f) if not lower in the night time. Be prepared with a cute hoodie and/or windbreaker combo to block the cold and keep you warm. Don’t be fooled by beach camping either. If you decide to take a sunrise stroll, the mist from the sea makes you feel like a vegetable in the produce section at Safeway.

 

Wipe it real good.

2nd Thing I Picked Up- Southern Comfort Ain’t No Joke

Wet wipes are Gods gift to women campers. I prefer the bio-degradable kind from Coleman. They’re easy, bio-degradable (duh), and you can use them for anything. Plus, they do a nice job of freshening you up, even if you’re on your period. (Side Note: whatever you do, do not go camping while on your period. It can be done, but it’s not pleasant, really. Way less pleasant if you go to an area that doesn’t have facilities). As long as wet wipes, dry shampoo, deodorant, tooth brush and tooth paste are on your "to bring" list, you’ll be pretty set. Or, there's always Monkey Butt.

 

Beer pong, flip cup and roulette. Oh my!

3rd Thing I Picked Up- Bring Your Own Entertainment

You never realize it until you're packed up and away from common amenities but life can be pretty boring. This really isn't an issue when you're camping. Everything in the mountains/outdoors is more fresh and invigorating (only exception: incredibly humid climates). Card games are a blast especially when you turn them into a drinking game and have zero worries about getting home. (Another side note: I play card games of all variety. Honestly, its more about the company you keep than the game itself. For an exception see Cards Against Humanity). Other general past times are going hiking or taking a walkabout. You get to see sights that are unique in every way and are rarely seen by others. Even if you decide to go mountain biking, play Frisbee, drink, nap, watch a movie or show on your tablet/smart phone, you’ll still enjoy the hell outta it. I also like to bring my portable speakers for a little groove every now and then. And by now and then, I mean all the time.

 

Zombies. It could happen.

4th Thing I Picked Up- Prepare for as much as possible

Here is a bunch of shit you should bring: Bring a poncho and umbrella everywhere just in case of rain.  Bring actual hiking boots or a cute pair of kicks that have decent ankle support. Pack Bug-Off or, my fave, mosquito coils. Deets is effective, but I don’t like the way it feels on my skin. Always bring sunblock. If you’re closer to the sun, you’ll get burned more (just as a quick FYI). Also, you don’t realize how much you’re in the sun while camping til it’s too late. So, take care of your skin.

 

Apple: Eat me.

5th Thing I Picked Up- Don't forget to be/feel sexy

 If Eve did it, so can you. Sex while camping can be done in a tent, out in the woods, in the car, in a field, anywhere. I’ve done each place recently while camping. Depending on where you go, who you're with and how secluded the location is, you can turn your campsite into a nudist colony for the weekend. Fresh, crisp air on your skin is an amazing aphrodisiac. Beach sex is tricky as sand does get in your vagina. That’s a real thing and it does not turn into a pearl. Laying down a beach mat can help keep the area clear of abrasive materials, but it's not 100% sand proof. If you go with a group, nudity is probably not a good idea  so secret sexy behavior may need to be on the menu.

 

You don't have to take my word for it. I found this pic on Google.

6th Thing I Picked Up – Make It Great

Stick to your strengths as a Prissy Girl. If you like to cook, prepare the menu and learn how to cook over the campfire and grate (Here is starter camping recipe website). Trust me, you can make 5 course meals while camping. Including desserts (besides amazing s'mores). If you’re more athletic, I don’t need to tell you to take a hike. You’re probably already doing it. If you’re a puzzle master Prissy Girl or of the book persuasion, bring puzzles and books. If you’re a bit more Prissy, do everyone’s nails. Clean em, polish them, whatever. Whatever it is you enjoy on a daily basis doesn’t have to go away just because you are camping. You may even surprise yourself to how much you’ll enjoy the outdoors.

The bottom line is this, camping can be fun as long as you make it so. There's plenty to do, ways to stay clean, and you don't have to be Bear Grylls to survive.

 

 

Check the links below for my go to camping menu items:

Camping Donuts
Dutch Oven Peach Cobbler
Kabobs

 Side note: Prepare your food beforehand as much as possible.

Coming Soon(ish): Prissy Girl's Guide to the Stanley Cup